Tag Archives: Married men who see prostitutes

Husbands Who Cheat With Escorts/Prostitutes

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A wife calls me. She discovered her husband has been cheating, with me, and others perhaps. Over the years, I have had to speak with a few other wives/girlfriends of clients. Strangely enough, each of these women share a similar patience towards me, the escort. They do not abuse me over the phone as one would expect. I often hear, “I know it’s your job, and I know you are probably doing it just for money, so I am not upset with you.”

The most heart-breaking part of speaking to the wife of a former client is when I hear the cries of small children in the background of the phone call. Coincidently, the last three wives who contacted me all said at one point, “Can you hold on for a moment?” while they attended to a crying baby or toddler. I hear small children making noise for their Mothers’ attention, while their Mother is emotionally destroyed from discovering her husbands infidelity. It is such a tragic scenario.

Up until recently, I usually was brief if a client’s wife or girlfriend called me. I denied knowing or associating with their husband, and said “This is my job. I see married men all the time and I do not ask about their personal lives. Sorry but there is nothing else I can say.”

But recently, I could not remain stoic with a sad wife who called me. I felt terrible for the woman on the other end of the line. She had just given birth, only to discover her husband’s thirst for other women. I wanted to cry with her for the deception that has ruined her world. What makes everything all the more confusing for these wives is that often their husbands are sweet men –some of my married clients are some of the most kindest, generous and loving type of men. But if someone can risk ruining another persons well-being to benefit themselves, are they really that great? How can someone casually cheat someone they supposedly love? Not all marriage scenarios are the same, however. Indeed, there are many cases I have observed where the husband cheats because he is purely selfish, apathetic and has no sense of appreciating what he has (a.k.a  he’s stuck in the deceptive ‘grass is greener’ fantasy). And then there are other cases where couples have little-to-no sex life at all, nor any sexual chemistry — and then the husband goes to escorts due to sexual deprivation. The reasons are complex, indeed — and moreover, it doesn’t help when one lives in a society that indirectly promotes cheating others for self-gain.

Things Are Not What They Seem: Picture-Perfect Deception?

The irony I have discovered is the fact that many married clients have very beautiful wives. Yes, beautiful women are cheated on commonly. It is only ironic because many people mistakenly believe that being ‘beautiful’ is enough to keep their partner sexually satisfied — women commonly make this wrong assumption. Genuine sexual bonding has very little to do with physical looks — sadly, many people do not realize this. We live in a world where people are lead to believe that sexual chemistry is found in those who appear sexy — appearing ‘sexual’ outwardly has no correlation to being internally sexualit is internal qualities that contributes to the sexual energy transfer between two bodies (a.k.a. chemistry).

Some regular clients show me pictures of their families and their wives. Some even show me their social media, where they have photos of their families. Ironically, many of my married clients have ‘picture perfect’ families. Recently, I googled one of my clients to check if he was using a real name or not. Incidentally, I ended up on the social media of this client’s fiancee. Her entire social media portrayed the picture-perfect life, complete with endless cute photos of her and her hubby-to-be. Sadly, little does she know that her future husband had traveled to another country to meet an escort, me. I imagine that outsiders may look at her life, or others like her, and wish they had what she portrays …..but little do outsiders know that her ‘picture perfect’ relationship consists of a husband who acts on his desires for other women. This only reiterates the realization of how much deception exists in life, especially in a time where people are obsessed with misleadingly showcasing themselves and their ‘lifestyles.’ Outsiders, generally, assume the same for high-class escorts — they assume escorts are satisfied for getting paid to have sex in comfortable settings — they don’t see what happens behind the scenes. I cannot count how many people I’ve met who are depressed because they feel their lives are not measuring up to the ‘perfect’ and ‘glamorous’ lives of people they see in real life or on social media. For such people, I always try to emphasize as much as I can, “Believe me, things are not what they appear to be.”

The Question of “Why Did They Cheat?”

The other day, I decided to share some of these thoughts with a regular married client of mine. I told him about the most recent cases of wives calling me. I have known this client for nearly 6 years now, so I was comfortable to discuss the sensitive subject of “cheating” with him (after all, he is married). We then got into a discussion of “Why?” I asked him, “Why do you come to see me?” Just as he has told me before, he said that him and his wife almost never have sex. Though, since we’ve been meeting over the last 6 years, he did have a baby with his wife between this time. His wife only allowed sex for the purpose of baby-making. I then asked, “What if you and your wife started having sex more often, would you still need to see other women?” He then explained that if he got sex from his wife, he would have no incentive to find it elsewhere. He also added, “But since I met you, it would be difficult to stop seeing you now.” And me, being myself, said, “I hope one day you won’t have to see me anymore.” I then asked about his wife and her sexuality — like many others, she shared the trait of being physically beautiful, yet lacking any desire for sex. What is one to do in this case? There is no simple answer. 

The purpose of writing this post was to share sympathy for wives of cheating husbands. Thank you for understanding that I and other escorts are doing this for money/survival. To married clients, please think twice about how much you are potentially hurting someone — be honest, be real.

If you are the spouse of cheating partner, what was your experience? If you are married man who see’s escorts, how do you justify it?

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Filed under Emotional Aspects Related to Escorting, Marriage, Relationships

Questions and Answers # 6 – Escorts, the Sex Industry, Pleasure, Sexuality

Escorts

1. How Do Prostitutes Please men? What Skills do Prostitutes have to please men? What are sexual techniques of prostitutes?

In my own experience, clients use their skills on me. For the most part, I never had to use any particular ‘skill’ to please them.

I have found questions like these circulating quite often. Since “how do prostitutes please men” is often being asked, then it is apparent there is a huge misconception with the sex industry. This idea that prostitutes are ‘skilled’ in sex is heavily misleading. Generally, it doesn’t require special sexual skill to be a prostitute, even an elite one. Prostitutes do not necessarily use special sexual techniques to entertain clients. Surely, escorts learn over the years about certain desires and become more confident, but it does not mean they require exceptional physical ‘skills’ necessarily. Opening ones legs, or bending over is not really a ‘special’ skill that’s unlike any other conventional sexual script.

As a courtesan, I do not actually have specific ‘skills’ or techniques that I strategically use on my clients. Rather, most of my clients derive their pleasure from pleasing me. They meet me. They see my body. They are besotted by my overall presence. My erotic appeal is, at first, visual….it’s my smile, my eyes, my body language. Otherwise, I do not perform any special sexual manoeuvres to seduce them. I just act myself in the moment, and we go with the flow. Most of the time, clients are already turned on (erect) by just meeting, seeing, talking, or touching the lady of their choosing.

When I first started this job, I really had little knowledge or experience with sex. When clients would meet me, they would be immensely aroused by just looking at me. My beauty, demeanour, and personality ignited their flames. I had no idea, back then, on how to act with clients. My experience is slightly biased, though, because of my body type. My body and the way I conduct myself, somehow, evokes submissiveness in many clients. I have a very womanly body, with very large breasts. Most clients want to, as some say, ‘worship,’ my body. Generally, kissing and caressing my body arouses them, so by the time we have sex, they are ready to explode. And when sweet men kiss and caress my body, with love and care, I am often very receptive to their touch and enjoy the embrace. So in actuality, it is clients who perform their skills on me, initially.

When I connect with certain clients of mine, it’s not so much the acts of sex, but rather the overall connection (the conversation, the caresses, the touches, the comfort). This is unique to every encounter, as it plays out differently with different clients.

The alluring part of seeing prostitutes is the overall setting — the fact there is no social pressures, obligations or expectations. A man can feel more at ease with a prostitute for a variety of reasons. She might be more sexually confident in how she conducts herself, or perhaps open-minded or explorational. Or just the fact she is attractive might be satisfying enough.

Unlike myself, many escorts are not welcoming of pleasure. A lot of the sex that occurs between prostitutes and clients is mechanical, and very ’empty.’ This is due to the reality that most sex workers in a contemporary context are not selling themselves for personal pleasure, but rather purely for financial needs. In such cases, the sex that occurs is often conventional, and not outlandish or strikingly ‘exotic’ as one may think. Clients can still cum even when there is no connection established. On the other hand, the minority of escorts, like myself, who do enjoy aspects of their job, might utilize mental and intellectual skills to connect with clients. The sex becomes special, not because of physical acts, but because of the connection established. As I say numerous times on my blog, amazing sex is based on chemistry of two bodies (a rather spiritual bond that cannot be learned, nor forced through ‘skill.’).

2. How to Behave like a High-Class Prostitute?

I stress the importance of being yourself. There are, unfortunately, some expectations associated with being a high-class prostitute, such as dressing a certain way, or mimicking the ‘elite.’ But honestly, one can still be a high-end prostitute and avoid these things. Some men care about fancy lingerie, while others don’t care at all. Some care about being polished, while others aren’t focused on such details. In essence, no matter how one behaves, an escort can NEVER appeal to all. If one is trying to manipulate their behavior, in order to achieve some sort of  ‘ideal’ or ‘perfect’ persona, they are setting themselves up for disappointment. Yes, even the most beautiful woman (by societies commercialized standards) can be unappealing for certain men, as there is so much variety in attraction.

3. Is it wrong to do sex with an Escort?

It’s ‘wrong’ if you internalize the idea of it being wrong. The mass shame associated with sexuality and sexual expression has a history, which the French philosopher Michel Foucault shows in “A History of Sexuality” is a modern European phenomenon, that emerged in the late  19th Century pertaining to the European obsession with trying to ‘scientifically’ define sex. The remains of these constructed ideas still exist — in social attitudes, in laws, etc. If you understand the history of sexuality, then you will likely understand why many people feel there is ‘shame’ with certain sexualities, sex acts or perhaps an ‘excess’ of it.

Bare in mind that prostitutes/courtesans have existed in other times and places where they were celebrated and held important status in certain societies. The contexts were vastly different than today. The ills of sex work today are related to the current social, political and economic context.

If you sleep with an escort, and you show her respect by being considerate, polite, treating her as an equal and paying her for her time,then how can it be wrong? But if you treat her like unjustly and insignificant, then yes…you are causing harm to another human soul.

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4. How do Escorts Stay Lubricated? How Does a Prostitute Get Wet?

We use lubrication gels or liquids, and apply them internally before seeing clients. When I first started this work, an older lady (a former prostitute) told a group of sex-workers and I a ‘wise’ technique. She said, “Lubricate yourself before you start the appointment rather than during the appointment. Try to give clients the illusion that you’re naturally wet, rather than letting him the know the reality that we’re not actually turned on.” I have always maintained this technique, but other escorts might apply the lube in front of the client.

Getting a woman aroused, or wet, is psychological; it requires genuine desire and arousal — and it’s impossible for a prostitute to feel genuine arousal with all of her clients. I get aroused in stances where I feel genuine attraction with someone I desire — and I am extremely picky in my attraction to others. Some of my clients I enjoy in sex, so in such cases I can bypass lubricants with them.

5. Do Sex Workers have Perfect Bodies?

This question really bothers me, because there is no such thing as one type of perfect body. Sadly, many people live in consumer, capitalistic societies where they are manipulated into believing that a shallow perfection exists. Thus, such manipulation makes one believe they are flawed and need to ‘improve’ themselves. What is perfection? Perfection, as with beauty, is in the eye of the beholder, subjective — there is no one type, or ‘ideal’ for all. This is the case in escorting, because what is ‘perfect’ for one client vastly differs from another. There are escorts of all shapes and sizes. Don’t fall for these tactics of believing in a perfect body type or look.

6: Do Escorts Prefer Rich Men?

I have wanted to address this question for a long time, because there is a stereotype of prostitutes willing to have sex with any man who offers them money. Some are more/less discerning than others. There is also an assumption that prostitutes strongly prefer wealthy men. My own personal preferences may differ from other escorts, because I prefer quality over quantity.  As a courtesan, I see clients very discerningly and sparingly. I am very picky with whom I see as clients, because I want to meet men whom I can potentially enjoy.  Thus, I choose men who I think will be a positive experience — regardless of social status. Wealth doesn’t imply decency, respect, pleasure, or even generosity. My brothel experiences, however, saw more variety of clients, less discerningly.

Indeed, escorts do love men whom are generous. But over the years, I have learnt that generosity does not mean one is necessarily rich or wealthy. I have met generous men from all social statures. Just because someone has a fancy job and wears fancy clothing does not mean he will be a good client, good at sex, or have a good heart, etc. Some clients may offer lots of money, yet at the compromise of an escorts comfort-level or dignity. When I lived overseas in a bigger city, there was a very tragic abundance of wealthy business men, who offered HUGE sums of money to high-class escorts to ‘party’ with them. By ‘party’ I am referring to doing drugs. Sadly, many escorts are lured to these clients because of the big pay-out. But is large sums of money worth the terrible, soul-less atmosphere? I try my best to avoid these type of clients. But sadly, many escorts do not. I feel sad when I see women chase certain wealthy men, whom have rather ‘soul-less’ attitudes and values. The money is not worth the degradation and consequences that follow. Indeed, not all wealthy clients are soul-less, as there are some wealthy clients whom, thankfully, retain humbleness.

I absolutely loath arrogant and chauvinist types (men who boast about their successes and money). I don’t care how much money is offered, my comfort is always first. For instance, I got a email the other day from a man who claimed to be a “wealthy business man.” I’m well aware of so-called ‘charming’ clients, so I rolled my eyes whilst reading his email. I have met lovely generous and/or wealthy men who do NOT need to boast about their financial success, so I am very skeptical about arrogant types. Anyway, this man had offered me a large sum of money for a multi-hour appointment. To top off his arrogance, he had to mention that he would be driving his self-claimed ‘luxury’ car. After I finished reading his email, I shook my head in dismay. Does he really think I am that stupid and shallow? Considering he’s that superficial, he will most likely be judging me on the same superficial basis. I could only imagine how uncomfortable I’d be with such an arrogant person. I wanted to email him back and give him a piece of my mind: “I am not interested in your money or car. I am not a senseless woman who is easily swayed by someone who’s only quality is his money!” But instead, I just ignored the email.

I have also had decent clients who have wanted to get more personal, and they made generous offers. But I was not comfortable with seeing them outside, such as dinners, outings or traveling. So I declined. Again, I don’t care how much money is offered, I will not go past my comfort level.

Looks can be misleading, so I learnt to not judge by first appearances. I will never forget one of my sweetest clients. It was in a brothel. When I first saw him, I felt scared. He was an extremely tall and broad man, with a very stern and hard looking face, and dressed in rugged, working-class attire — he looked like he would snap me in half. But as soon as we entered the bedroom, I heard his voice. He was a soft, gentle, sweet man. His intimidating appearance was softened instantly. He turned out to be extremely gifted in giving pleasure. He also gave me very generous tips after every appointment, which initially I found to be shocking because he looked rather rugged! There have been many others like him, where I misjudged upon first appearance, only to be later impressed by their kindness and generosity afterwards. Likewise, a client could be well-dressed, wearing expensive designer items, boasting of their successes, and voila, they turn out to be cheap. You can afford a Mercedes, and yet you are asking a prostitute for a discount?

Overall, great clients cannot be defined by their money. I have always liked humble men, who have kind hearts and good intentions, which comes in all walks of life. What saddens me is that escorts can be cruel themselves. When I was working in a brothel, I observed it was common for escorts to be rude to ‘unattractive’ or socially nervous clients. These were men who were  kind and sweet, yet because they appeared ‘uncool’ or timid they were treated cruelly by some escorts. I try my best not to judge clients on initial appearances, but rather judge by how they treat me. A genuinely warm heart and kind soul makes someone attractive in my eyes. So in essence, there is good and bad in all people, in all walks of life.

My Sheik is not from a wealthy Saudi family. I mistakenly assumed he was a wealthy Saudi, because he has always been extremely generous with me, starting from the first day we met. In reality, however, he is simply blessed with a highly skilled profession and education, accompanied by a very handsome salary. But he has no familial support. I used to wonder why he is extremely loving, devoted, and generous with me. Thanks to him, almost 3 years of my life have been eased by his sweetness. Despite all that he’s given, he never put conditions upon me. Instead, he let me control him, in an affectionate way. I have realized that those who have less often appreciate the value of something more than those whom have everything. My Sheik is so humble, which is why I love him so much. Blessed is his beautiful heart.

7: How would married men (who see escorts) feel if their wives slept with other men?

I was surprised to see this question. It’s funny, because I’ve often toyed this question with my own married clients: “How would you feel if your wife was sleeping with another man?” And funny enough, most of them said, “I wouldn’t accept it.”

8: Do Escorts Prefer Good Looking Men?

Looks are subjective. Personality is key. A beautiful personality can make everything beautiful — the way he talks, the way he touches, etc. A man who is only physically handsome isn’t really meaningful (in my personal view).

9. How to Drop a Fetish and Enjoy Normal Sex?

One should be cautious about the term ‘normal,’ which is why I always put quotations around this word. Norms are socially and culturally constructed, and thus norms mean different things in differing contexts. I was shocked to see this question, and then felt sad for whomever asked it. It’s so tragic that mainstream ideas of sex are so limiting, and that certain desires are categorized outside of the realm of ‘normal.’

Anything considered ‘normal/abnormal’ is simply a construction of a particular society. Norms change, and norms often reflect the interests of state power. Contemporary political elites promote what they constructed as ‘normal’ sex in a ‘normal’ relationship simply because they were/are concerned with reproduction — reproducing their workforce, their armies — which thereby sustains their power.  This is why ‘other’ sexualities are often stigmatized and/or condemned (via state/national campaigns), because any ‘uncontrolled’ relations that do not result in maintaining state power are seen as threatening. Thus, various discourses arise trying to convince populations to follow the ‘norm.’

Building off the work of Foucault, cultural anthropologist Gayle Rubin (1984) wrote the history about how sex ‘norms’ were categorized into ‘norms’ in the late 19th century by European medical professionals. Constructing these norms, of course, correlated with state political agendas — regulating the sexual lives of populations to maintain state interests. These sex ‘norm’ categorizations are widely critiqued and dismissed by academics now, yet sadly these sex ‘norms’ discourses still exist in mainstream society.  

In the chart below, Rubin illustrates what was constructed as ‘normal’ and ‘abnormal’ sex by Western medical professionals in the late 19th century. The acts in the inner circle are were deemed ‘normal,’ whilst the acts on the periphery were ‘abnormal’ acts. This mode of thinking is problematic on so many levels, making many false assumptions on sexuality. Tragically, these Victorian sexual norms prevailed as the West spread their dominance globally, and sadly many people still adhere to this discourse:

gayle-rubin-chart

What’s tragic is when people internalize this construction of what is ‘normal’ and therefore associate shame with anything ‘out of the norm.’ In reality, there has always been a diversity of sexual desires, and sexuality has been defined in vast different ways in other social and cultural contexts. One should be cautious of viewing certain things in strictly binary terms (good/bad, normal/abnormal, hetero/homo, etc).

Rather than drop a ‘fetish’, it’s better to find a partner who will embrace your desires. Erase this idea of ‘proper’ ways of having sex, because in reality there is are many ways of enjoying pleasure.

10. How Fast do Men Cum/Ejaculate with Escorts?

Clients are usually quite excited when meeting an escort, so most do not last long in sex. In some cases, men come even before the sex happens, just through touching. It’s common for clients to last under a minute. Some clients are embarrassed of cumming fast, and many try to last longer (fearing the escort will judge his performance). I cannot recall how many times clients have apologized to me for ejaculating quickly.

A lot of clients who cum fast try to compensate for their briefness in sex, so they spend a lot of time giving the woman pleasure beforehand. This has been my experience at least. I am sure many clients don’t care if they come fast, and don’t care what the escort thinks of their performance. But in my own experience, I find most of my clients (especially regular clients) want to perform good for me. They want to prolong the pleasure, so they spend time teasing me.

I’d imagine the whole idea of seeing an escort is exciting and arousing, so it’s not surprising when men release fast. They are usually instantly hard before we even start touching, and they get excited from just feeling my body.

11. How to Make a Prostitute Hornier?

Well firstly, be mindful if a prostitute has expressed an interest in exploring her sexuality with you. She might not be willing. What if she’s not really interested in sex? What if she’s not attracted to you?  One cannot force someone to get aroused.

Every woman is different in her sexual expression and desires, so it’s impossible to say what makes a prostitute, generally, horny. Bare in mind that many prostitutes are not very welcoming when clients try to get too intimate. In my case, I’m in the minority of prostitutes who does embrace pleasure with clients. For me, I am quite responsive to clients who are extremely respectful and make me feel completely relaxed. If they genuinely enjoy to massage and caress my whole body, in a way that makes me feel relaxed, then I usually feel somewhat turned on. On the other hand, I’m easily turned off by clients who assume they know what they are doing in sex and foreplay, in an arrogant manner. I’ve discussed this with other escorts too, and we agree that ‘demanding’ or overly confident clients are really annoying. For instance, I had a client who was fond of my breasts. He grabbed my boobs and played with them, but his touch was really rough (usually most men are very gentle). It was tolerable, so I let him do it, because he seemed really enjoy it. Whilst he was fondling me, he kept saying “You like it, don’t you…feel’s good, doesn’t it?” I actually found it really funny, and I just played along. After he came, he asked me if I enjoyed his fondling of my breasts. I wanted to laugh. He was terrible. He didn’t turn me on at all. He was far too rough, and he didn’t even have the decency of asking what I like. Since he was quite arrogant, I told him I wasn’t impressed. Thankfully, most clients are not like him. Lovely men are usually gentle and slow to start, and they take direction from the woman, observe her responses, and respect her level of comfort.

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Filed under "High-class" prostitution, Questions for Escorts And Clients, The Escorting Business

Your Questions, My Answers #4 – The Sex Industry and Human Sexuality

I love checking my stats for this blog and seeing the numerous search engine terms. It gives an idea of what people think about prostitutes. One thing that pops up very often is the question: do prostitutes get pleasure? I answered that question in previous posts. But I should restate it: we have sex with clients for money, not out of pleasure (even though some of us enjoy some clients). The other common misconception is that many people assume a whore (a woman who loves sex) is synonymous with a prostitute (a woman who has sex for money). Ahh…it is interesting how we live in a world that’s obsessed with sex, yet is still so confined to norms and social attitudes. Why is it such an issue? Well, human sexuality was made political (causing a moral panic) since the 19th century in the Modern context. Why? Sexuality is associated with reproduction. What is the most important thing to national leaders? To reproduce their society, so they can gain dominance in this competitive (poisoned), capitalistic world. Anyway, I won’t get in to that now….

 

Your Question: Should I get a female prostitute for my wife?

If its her idea, sure. Be sure to find a quality and genuinely sensual private escort (finding an escort who is genuinely in tune with her sexual desires — such as being intimate with other women — is not easy). Bare in mind, many escorts are willing to do ‘girl-on-girl’ for the money, but I cannot tell you how many times I’ve witness ‘girl-on-girl’ appointments where the experience was completely mechanical and fake. I’ve always fantasized to have a beautiful, wholesome woman to be my client. Or vice versa: I have the fantasy of being a patron for a beautiful, wholesome courtesan. But it’s just not common having a beautiful woman seek an escort (unless, in rare cases, she’s with her male partner).

Once I saw a couple. It was the woman who wanted to live out this fantasy. It was a very great experience. The woman was not particularly my type, but regardless she was lovely. I cannot explain the intensity of touching and caressing a woman while a man is getting so turned on by the very sight. Both a man and woman’s body is interesting for me, so I didn’t mind exploring a woman who wasn’t exactly my ideal. She made me cum, while her lover watched. It made me wonder if such openness between couples is a truly a good thing?

While some fantasies sound good in theory, are they good in reality? I used to tell my ex about my threesome fantasies. He loved when we talked about it, but he said that he would never do it. Why not? He said it wasn’t healthy for a relationship. His argument was this: if we do it once, then what if one of us has uncontrollable urges to do it again and again? I embrace being open in a relationship, but sometimes having no limits can cause havoc.

 

Your Question: As an Escort, How Much Should I Charge clients?

Basic economics 101: It’s the law of supply and demand, which varies from city to city. For instance, there are an abundance of ‘inexpensive’ women available in my locale. More women = lower prices. Less women = higher prices.  Dave Chapelle made a hilarious joke related to this, “If Pussy was a stock, then we’ve flooded the market! Women are giving it away too easy.

My price is in the higher-end range for my city, which also means I limit my clientele (since many men cannot afford my rate/rather restrictive rules). I adjust my rate depending on which city I am in. When I worked overseas the particular city was wealthier and therefore I could increase my price. There is a demand for ‘high-quality’, safe escorts for a more discerning clientele, but these type of women are a minority in the sex industry.

I must also note that not every girl can successfully charge high rates. Men have certain expectations with women who charge higher-than-average rates. For one, an expensive escort is expected to be exceptional in some way, whether it’s beauty, intellectual or sensuality (or perhaps the entire combination). Although part-time, I consider myself a very skilled courtesan. Over the years, I learned how to cater to the needs of a client and how to act like the companion that he desires. If a woman does not satisfy the expectations associated with her price, then she will not have repeat clients. She must be ‘worth it’, but again, one’s worth is also a perception.

 

Your Question: What do Girls do after Appointments?

We eat! I don’t know what it is about sex, but hunger and thirst follows afterwards. It’s a universal among escorts that we love eating (especially when we work in a brothel establishment together). We order food in abundance. Sometimes we make our clients wait so we can eat some chocolate or delicious delicacies. To be quite honest, I miss the ‘in between time’ when working at a brothel. The ‘in between time’ is when girls have a break in between seeing clients. We sit together, a group of girls (hopefully a good group — because escorts are infamous for their cattiness towards each other), we order food, some smoke cigarettes, we tease and laugh about our clients, and we discuss the most vulgar subjects. Many times the night turned into an all-girl party; we all made money, celebrated and laughed until it hurts. As an independent, I don’t get to experience any of that ‘female bonding’ anymore (which is also a good thing….escorts can be terrible influences on each other).

The ‘good’ girls never last long at brothels…they eventually move on to something or somewhere else. There used to be a good group of escort girls that I knew when I worked overseas. These girls made going to work fun. They were girls with other goals besides sex-work. Eventually the group disintegrated and we went our separate ways. It was during these female ‘in-between’ bonding times that I got to observe a lot of behaviors/realities/circumstances for women who are in the sex industry. Yet for the short time we shared together, we gave each other support.

 

Your Question: How to “fuck prostitutes and not get caught by wife?”

This mentality makes me cringe sometimes. I understand social pressures and not wanting to break-up the family, but the sneakiness of infidelity is alarming. The only infidelity that I don’t really condemn is with men who’ve been married for a lengthy time, and their wives (due to old age, disability, no interest, etc) do not have sex anymore.  But I do not feel sympathy for younger men, especially newly married men, who cheat on their wives just for the sake of ‘variety.’ If variety is what you desire, then opt for an open relationship or don’t get into a relationship with someone who expects monogamy. If only there was more openness in relations.

Once, I met a great client who was in an open relationship (his wife knew he was seeing me). They were a loving couple with children. They were educated and realistic about their needs. They had a private, semi-open relationship, complete with set boundaries. Both were permitted to see other people within reason, but the main restriction was: no sex with others. And that man, as a client, was utmost respectful of his wife’s restrictions and remained disciplined. Their relationship made me more warm towards the idea of an open-relationship (something I haven’t tried …it’s always been one-sided, in my favor).

Sadly, many men do go to lengths to hide their sexual affairs. They get private mobile phones, they slip away for an hour or so, and even bring their own soap. One of my married clients brings his own body-wash, because he worries that my ‘girly-scented’ soaps will make his wife suspicious.

 

Your Question: Why would an Escort want to stop seeing a client?

Well, as mentioned, some men develop strong feelings for us (which can make us uncomfortable). It’s problematic when the love is one sided (he falls in love, and we just liked him as a client only). Love is an irreversible thing…I can’t just tell a man to ‘stop loving me’ and he will switch his emotions off. Sometimes these men can also interfere with our personal lives, which gets overbearing. When I was overseas, I had a devoted client who fell in love with me, and we became quite close. However, I only just saw him as a favorable regular client of mine. He became obsessive, and I had to end it. (I will talk about him in a future post). There are also issues of morality. In rare cases, it is the escort who truly likes a client, and thus she might feel uncomfortable to continue seeing him as a client (but in most cases, it’s usually the first scenario mentioned above).

It might be shocking to know that I, as a sex worker, have my own morals. Sometimes clients are too candid about their personal lives. They openly tell me they are married or attached, or they have children, or their life stories, etc. In my brothel days, one particular client told me too many personal details about his life, and as a result I rejected him. Why? He was a very sweet man, but his life circumstances conflicted with my morals. When I first met him, his wife (as he told me) was heavily pregnant with their second child. He said he was working two jobs to make a good life for his family. He claimed his wife being pregnant as an excuse for no intimacy between them. He also stated how he loved his wife dearly. Yet ironically, he was spending a large sum of money (for him) to spend time with me. I couldn’t justify it. He wasn’t financially well off, and the money he used to pay for me could be put to better use (he could use that much-needed money for his family). For this reason, I advised him to stop seeing me. I told him to go home to his pregnant wife, and give her comfort, do something special for her , but don’t spend hundreds of dollars (that you really cannot afford) for spending one hour admiring an escort. It amazes me how far men will go just to have sex and be with a woman!

Did he listen? No, of course not. Men love women who are ‘unavailable.’ According to him, I was special. I was the only girl he saw. For him, he felt I was ‘worth it.’ But I felt guilty taking money that could be used for someone (his wife and child) who needed it more. So, I told him, once again, to stop seeing me. That was the last time, and soon after I stopped working in that particular establishment. Apparently, he still calls the establishment looking for me

 

Your Question: How to Make Clients Spend Money on You?

The only thing I can say is be yourself. Don’t be greedy, be thankful. I am an honest escort. I have been in many situations where I could ‘exploit’ the situation of my clients for gain. I know how to do it, but it goes against my personal ethics. I am a woman who has a heart, and therefore I cannot hurt people intentionally. I see the merit in honesty.

But! Unfortunately, not all escorts (or women, people for that matter) have honest intentions! I’ve seen plenty of women (working and non-working) who can lie, use and manipulate good people for their own selfishness.

I am not perfect. I have made mistakes in the past and hurt decent people. But it hurt me also.

If you are an escort looking for cheap and easy ways to “scam” a man…you are reading the wrong blog. It is an unfortunate truth that many women in the industry are not honest, and do give the honest ones a bad reputation.

 

Your Question: Do Escorts ever Fall in Love with One Man?

Why not? Escorts are human. Why do people assume that an escorts needs/desires are any different than a non-escort? Like any individual, an escort her own unique preferences. Ironically, despite the fact that most escorts defy social norms, I’ve observed many escort women who desire heteronormative relationships in their personal lives (ie: monogamy and marriage).

Personally, I can be loyal to my love, but I don’t know if I could be monogamous, however.

 

Your Question: Does Escort Work Ruin Her Sex Life? (Does Prostitution Ruin our Personal Sex Lives?)

It’s a logical question. One would think that having too much sex would be physically draining (especially because society assumes that women are hardly horny). I’m sure this is the case for some women, because too many women are still shy or unaware of their erotic capabilities. But personally, sex work intensified my desires. Sometimes, seeing clients is like a big tease (a build up), and makes me crave my personal lovers. In fact, I attribute that being with multiple clients taught me so many great things about intimacy. My experience with countless clients made me a better, more enthusiastic lover in my personal life. In this blog I focus on the implications of escorting, which are solely negative. But I have to say being a prostitute gave me access to some sexually-talented men, and contributed to me being in tuned with my body and thus experiencing an amazing personal sex life. Something about being a courtesan makes me feel sexually assertive, and enhanced my dominance persona with men. Perhaps this reason could explain why most clients are concerned with making sure I get pleasure.

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