I would like to think of myself as a ‘Halal’ prostitute, if such a title could exist. The fact that I have sex before marriage means that I am anything BUT halal. However, if one puts halal in the context of being genuine, kind, and traditional then I consider myself halal. What I mean is that I’m have a lot of respect for myself and I have many halal values (except having sex out of wed-lock, of course). I don’t drink, I don’t dress vulgar in my day-to-day life, I am kinda conservative besides the fact that I sell myself. I would love to travel to the Middle East one day, and investigate the lives of Muslim prostitutes. I want to know why they chose this profession (or did they have a choice at all? — I’m sure many are forced into the profession). I want to know their values, and how they feel about men. Am I the only ‘halal’ prostitute, …or do others exist?
For some men, I fit the mold of an ideal partner, but my only is stain is that I happen to be a prostitute. I attract men who want a serious relationship, yet the problem is my fierce need for self-governance. However, my desire for independence conflicts with my natural urge for needing love and acceptance. Again, the story of my life is how to reconcile the conflicting ideals.
It feels good that one of my closest friends is now aware of my lifestyle (that I am an escort). She said to me, teasingly, “Do you think you are the Mother Theresa of prostitutes?“ This was in reference to our conversation about the types of men I encounter. I was telling this friend how I feel sorry for some men, the ones who are sweet but do no possess the social skills to ‘pick up’ women. I told her how I sympathize with some of my clients. For instance, when I meet a man who may not be handsome or socially accepted but has pure and honest heart…I will treat him well, and I want to show him love (even if it’s only for one or two hours…I want to show him my affection, even though I do not actually love him).
It is the greatest injustice that we commit as human beings: denying love to others. The notion of lacking love is what contributes to a lot of social problems. Denying someone love from an early age can have many negative reactions in the future. So, always be thankful to be alive. Again, problems we feel here in the West are NOTHING in comparison to the serious issues (such as famine and war) faced by those in the peripheral. Be thankful everyday, and do your best to provide someone (even a stranger) with some compassion. Where does one get the idea that we should deny anyone love? I ask myself this question. I denied my ex the right to continue to love me. We are now separated for a year…and I must admit that I still love him. Yet I also love my Sheik. In a perfect world, I could love all of them and provide my affection to all. Unfortunately the world is full of possessiveness, emotions, and angst.
Escorts, especially the beautiful and successful ones, can develop huge egos. They think their pussies are gold and superior (when in reality there is no such thing). As result, the money and the attention from men makes these women develop an arrogant attitude. This has happened to me too, however whenever my egos gets too inflated the natural equilibrium kicks in to push me down to earth. Anyway, some girls never come back down to earth (become humble), and resultingly these women treat men who are not handsome or ‘cool’ as inferiors. I have seen this many times: a beautiful co-worker of mine belittling and criticizing about a lovely and sweet client just because he wasn’t ‘hot.’ For me, I feel sorry for these men who face rejection, so I try my best to show them affection and provide them with a service that is genuine.
A few instances I have come across clients who had some obvious imperfections (by society’s standards). These men did not fit society’s ideals in terms of superficial ideals (physical appearance, attire, etc). Most escort women feel ‘business’ men, who dress sharply in expensive suits, are ideal. But to be quite honest I find them utterly boring and very unappealing. Business men who value money and power have no personal value to me. I’ve observed that the men who’ve tipped me the biggest sums where NOT wearing suits. They were wealthy by chance, and did not feel the urge to flaunt it, but rather they were modest and practical
The Concept of using “High-class” as an Escort?
I am skeptical about the name that is assigned to women like me: high-class. It signifies that I am superior over other prostitutes because I’ve conformed to the ideals of the rich. As I get older I’m starting to see how sick this Western society and mentality is: this society brainwashed us to worship the rich, the powerful, and the beautiful (yet, are these people really the ones who are altruistic, humanistic, and empathetic??) Our society tells us to value the worst aspects of society: the elite, the upper class of snobs who exploit the masses. What other name can I advertise myself as other than high-class? Should I be the ‘socially conscious and intellectual escort? Unfortunately, to be part of this perverted game, I must conform to what will bring me business: the high-class escort. If only I could advertise myself as: I am a Halal Escort…..
Film for thought: I watched an Algerian film that depicts a Muslim prostitute. It’s called Viva L’Algerie. I suppose the character playing the prostitute was ‘halal’…because there is a scene where she wears her modest Islamic outfit (possibly an Abaya) over her sexy slinky dress for work.