Monthly Archives: January 2011

What Makes a Successful Escort?

It’s a hard question. A common misconception is that only beautiful girls make money. Yet beauty is very subjective. And more importantly, outer beauty is simply not enough to become a wholesomely desirable woman. One can never appeal to all. Being successful and making good money are very temporal for an escort, and very susceptible to fluctuation.

Girls who make lots of money are hustlers. Which means they chase the money at all the multiple scales of ‘high-class’ escorting, and they essentially make escorting their life (ie: they work full-time and are often willing to work at all hours of the day). However, while working full-time can equate to lots of money, I’d argue that working constantly is a recipe for short-term success only. Working full-time is not easy by any means. A woman may make a lot of money for a period of time, yet it does not mean she will continue to be successful endlessly. What makes an escort successful versus how much money she’s made are not the same thing.  One woman I knew (who’s in the industry) lives quite a lavish lifestyle. You’d think that she’s making $1000+ US dollars per hour. But in reality, she does a mixture of jobs catering to clients of all rate-scales. She works in a brothel-like establishment in the day-time. This pays her approximately $240 per hour (the business takes $70 dollars.), which seems very low. Then she advertises and does private out-calls/incalls for a much higher price. She works every day, and like many other full-time escorts, she, sadly, use drugs and alcohol to lessen the emotional impact. Yes, one can make lots of money by working full-time, but at what cost? Short-term goals of making fast-money often have negative implications. Aside from being susceptible to drugs and alcohol, working too often can also make an escort harden, or burn out, more faster. In other words, working too frequently will make her experiences with clients more rigid, and therefore her chances of regular clientele will be stipulated. I personally recommend working less, if that’s an option. Once a woman can become established as an independent escort, I recommend working less at higher rates to a select clientele. And finally, I stress the importance of balancing one’s life with clients and other things they enjoy (outside of their work).

*I should also note that many ‘high-class’ escorts give off the facade of wealth/luxury, when in reality they are spending all of their income on designer goods to promote their image. She might be carrying Chanel bags, but it doesn’t imply she’s successful or wealthy. For an escort, wealth and success are extremely vulnerable to flux. In my opinion, a successful escort is moderate in her spending; she saves a lot or invests into a home, because she’s mindful that she cannot sell herself forever.

Extremely high-priced girls are not necessarily more ‘worthy’ than a girl with more moderate hourly rates. In fact, as mention, many escorts are often working at multiple rate scales. The difference is simply marketing and the overall economics of the particular city, which does not necessarily reflect quality of the woman. Some ‘hustler’ women I met are catering to two types of clientele: clients who see private/independent escorts only, and ‘brothel rats,’ (as they called them) men who visit brothel establishments only. Escorts do not all work in the same ways, and many women establish their own preferences on where, when and how to work. What is comfortable for one woman is different than other. Usually, women work in scenarios related to their comfort. For instance, a lot of ‘elite’ escorts prefer the brothel/agency setting opposed to working independently.

For myself, personally, I have never been a hustler in the sense of working full-time. I have always worked part-time as an escort, at my own leisure and comfort. Yet despite working part-time, I make a generous income for working so infrequently, and I am satisfied with having enough to live comfortable, and establishing some savings gradually. I don’t want to ‘hustle’ and work full-time as a professional escort, because I have seen how so many escorts over-work themselves and resultantly burn out. Then again, I have to be so thankful that I can have the luxury of being able to work less and live relatively well — some women aren’t as lucky, and are sort of compelled to work full-time.

What Girls are Most in Demand?

From my observations, there are a few characteristics that drive men wild. Yet again, one must remember that desires are so diverse, so I always recommended escorts to be themselves.
A stunningly beautiful girl who’s new to the sex industry or a particular place (or city) will likely be popular at first. However, once she’s slept with the men who were curious about her …she will only continue to be successful if she has the brains or sexual confidence to match.

For the most part, clients want good sex and good companionship. I’ve seen many beautiful girls who get overly confident in their first months, only to be shocked why they don’t have any regulars. Outer beauty, alone, has nothing to do with establishing a true connection with a worthy, wholesome client.

Another interesting thing I’ve observed is the POWER of chemistry and pheromones. I truly believe this, as I have observed this endlessly. Working in an establishment, I’ve seen girls who don’t really get picked, but suddenly one day they are constantly being chosen. During the days where I worked in an establishment, I’ve noticed that certain times during my monthly cycle that men were dying to devour me. For instance, there are times I barely wear makeup and feel sleepy, yet every man I meet wants to book with me. I could be completely covered up, yet somehow men detected my monthly ‘ripeness.’ I recall memories of working where every client was eagerly licking, kissing and tasting my whole body — as if my body was emitting an intoxicating, delicious scent. Typically this is around my ovulation period, and perhaps I am feeling most horny at this time (somehow the men can detect it — the heat of my body).

Likewise, at times when I was extremely stressed, I was no longer the ‘belle de jour’ at the brothel. The first times I started to falter in my bookings (otherwise known as burnout) was when I started quarrelling often with my ex-fiance. Most of the quarrelling was because I wasn’t sure the ‘normal’ relationship route was actually what I wanted. The constant fighting made me either not sleep at all, over oversleep….which gave birth to dark circles and puffy eyes when I was 22. Stress is the WORST recipe for being an escort. It does not matter how beautiful you are, but if you are stressed and needing to make money (and feeling animosity towards men at the same time)….don’t even bother!

I remember meeting a really gorgeous escort a few months ago. She was new the industry. She was quite attractive and had a slim body with enhanced breasts. I told her that she would be really popular because she was quite pretty. To her dismay, she only had 1 client during her 7 hour shift. This made me certain that STRESS alone can kill off the chemicals that men are attracted too. She told me she was desperate to make money, as she had a child and was extremely stressed about her money situation. I told her she needs to relax and feel good…..and that hopefully next shift her ease will reflect more clients. In essence, chemicals are very powerful in attraction.

Who are the most popular girls?

Again, it’s a perception. A girl can be popular for periods of time, but as mentioned before…even the most beautiful girl will go from being popular to just having her regulars and a consistent flow. But again, it really depends, as all escorts are unique individuals. I, myself, was one of the ‘popular’ girls at the brothel, which means I was often chosen by clients. As an independent escort, the dynamics are different, because now, I choose from the pool of clients who contact me. I am always thankful that I have been a desired woman in this industry. As clients would tell me, I have both beauty and intellect. I am chosen for both reasons, but at other times it’s one or the other. Apart from my admired big boobs and shapely backside, I retain a bit of elegance in my mannerisms, dress and speech also, so many clients express how this attracted them and made them feel at ease. Presentation plays an important role in what sort of clients an escort will attract. If I had a rude personality and presented myself as purely flesh, I would certainly attracted a different clientele (the kind I wouldn’t like).

Girls who are quite sought after can be many things. One popular lady I knew was an escort I developed a crush on. I remember the first day meeting her and thinking she wasn’t that pretty. She was in her 30’s, and was quite popular with respectable clients. Once I heard her beautiful voice and getting to see her mannerisms, I became mesmerized by her — I had never met a woman like her before. She was different from anyone I had ever met, and for the first time in my life I found an escort I could admire.  After getting to know her, I found her to be strikingly beautiful (inside and out). I could see what drew men to her…she had such an intoxicating persona, genuine and loving. She was extremely intelligent, sincerely sweet, and I suppose her age gave her a natural sex appeal (her and I shared clients, so I discovered she was quite ‘tuned’ with her sexuality). This woman actually changed my entire concept of beauty. Initially, I hardly noticed her, but after seeing the beauty of her inner-self, I became immensely attracted to her in every sense. What society tells us to desire in terms of beauty is NOT necessarily beauty, especially if it’s only shallow.

In my city, the most popular girls vary. I’ve noticed there is always a huge demand for rare women who aren’t typically found in the business: For instance, there is a lack of certain ethnic escorts in some areas, so therefore these women are popular due to their rareness.

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When I can’t control my hormones…

The odd thing about being a working girl is that I crave sex almost all the time (well, ‘good’ and meaningful sex). Somedays I may see several clients, and after and in between sessions I sometimes masturbate. I’ve observed that my body is more aroused at certain times of the month than others. For instance, I peak about 10 days after my period. That’s where I am at now.

The last three days I’ve gone crazy with some of my clients. I have a few favorites. In my city there has been an influx of international students from the Gulf (Saudi Arabia). All of them are under thirty, with the majority being under 25. For the first time in years I’ve been infatuated with men who are young like me. Previously I assumed young guys are too immature, but I find myself loving their innocence.

The Saudis love me. To them I am the epitome of an Arabian beauty. After all I have long, thick black hair, big almond eyes, olive skin, full lips, and a very curvaceous sexy body. I’m very vain with them because I know I’m like a goddess for them…and I flaunt it.

So last night, I invited a client (the Sheik) over to my home. He’s an international student, and mid-twenties. I have been seeing him for a several months now. It took me about 2 months to remember his name, because I kept confusing him with the other Saudi boys I met. Recently, I have been very passionate with him and we are becoming quite intimate. I’m sure he must’ve met me when I was working on a day when my hormones were raging. I usually make lots of tips and avid regulars when I work during those times. More than once I end up crossing my limits …and end up kissing a client or two passionately.

In previous bookings this particular client has never made me come. Most of the young Saudi boys are inexperienced with sex, but they are very eager to learn and please– what makes me aroused. Almost all of them are dying to kiss passionately, which isn’t something I normally do. But last night, him and I kissed quite a bit. We had sex the first time, and collapsed in each others arms until our hormones called each other for a second round. He started touching my body, and his touch brought out the silky saturation from down below. And then, I ended up coming with him! It was intense and so intimate. He tipped me more than usual…which made me even more happy because I was not expecting it.

On Friday I had delicious sex with another favorite client of mine. Let’s call him Mr.Zee. He’s older..around mid-30’s…and is the epitome of ‘manly’ (which I love). Tall, dark, and handsome fit his description well. We met about 4 months ago…and his touch has me craving him at times. He licks me from head to toe, kissing my whole body, but the way he does it makes me melt. The sad part is that he is married, and it makes me angry that such a lovely man is constantly cheating his wife. For this reason I’ve often told myself that I will stop seeing him. Most clients ARE married and while it bothers me I try not to think about it. But with him, it’s different. The sex we have isn’t business….it’s intimate. When he comes, he holds me afterwards in his arms…like lovers do. For this reason, I feel terrible…..because he is not just cheating with some random escort – he’s loving her body and giving her pleasure.

I used to think that I’d rather have a man CHEAT with a prostitute rather than have an affair. Right? Because at least with an escort everything is assumed to be STRICTLY business. But it’s not true. Most married clients want true intimacy with me. They don’t just want a quick penetration…….most sweet married men want all the intimate things: kissing, performing oral sex on me, making me orgasm, etc. Some of these ‘sweet’ married men even ask if they can lick and kiss my bum! I could not even imagine the man I love doing such things with another woman. It would bother me immensely if I found out a man I loved was sucking another woman’s pussy and tasting her juices rather than simply just quickly fucking her.

So yes, I considered to start ignoring Mr. Zee because there is too much emotion (and it makes me feel horrible for his poor wife). Yet I am conflicted because I LOVE having sex with him. Morally it would be better if he fucked me quickly and left, right? But it’s those other acts that drive me wild with him. The kissing,….the way he goes down on me and makes me so wet. He makes love to me just how my ex did…..slow, but will be rough when I command him to do so.

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Escorting leads to Same-Sex Exploration?

I am a woman who loves beautiful women. I am, however, picky. I like girls who have high morals, very simple, humble, genuine, intelligent, cultured, artistic, and naturally beautiful.

Initially, women never appealed to me in a sexual way. However, once I was fully acquainted with the escort world, I started to become more open in my sexuality. My preference is strongly for men, but I do admit that I have a deep attraction to a minority of women occasionally.

My interest actually started when I encountered women who acted playful with me. My big natural boobs were always a subject of fascination among escorts in the brothel, as I was usually the only lady with big naturals. So mild flirtations occurred, where women would playfully grab my breasts or ask to see them. One girl went to the extreme of always groping me and rubbing her face in my boobs as a gesture of greeting. Of course, it was all innocent. Moreover, it’s typical of escorts in a brothel to be touchy with co-workers in a non-sexual way. But then I discovered that some women actually do get more intimate, and I started to think about it. My problem now is I’m not attracted to ‘working’ girls despite how beautiful some of them were.

The exception was a lady I met while working overseas. We became friends at work (escorting), and were often lost in hours of conversation during the ‘in-between’ periods of clients. She was nearly 10 years older than myself….and I felt, like me, she was not a typical working girl. She was educated, well-traveled, and had such an elegant demeanour. She did escorting for short periods. Then with the money earned she traveled the world to further her career in International Relations. I admired her…and had a crush, but it was not sexual. It was more of a longing for affection…

A month ago, I decided to try something.  I had sex with a woman. I didn’t like the sex part, but I’m glad I tried it.  She was a girl who fit my particular tastes..she was exotic. She’s a lovely person, but the whole experience made me realize that my body craves for a man. I did enjoy the touching and caresses, but the actual sex part with a woman is not something I lusted for (at least yet). She ended up spending the night. In the morning, she started to touch my body in sexual ways ..but it seemed strange. I wasn’t interested. Rather I missed him, my ex.

My ex-fiancee and I speak everyday, and I told him about my experience with the lady. He was angry. I always would tell him that I wanted to be with a girl, and he hated the idea. He was fiercely jealous.He said he hates the idea of sharing me with anyone, even a woman.

The urge to be with a woman comes and goes, yet it isn’t sexual per say. Perhaps it is my longing for female solidarity, or a longing to be near someone who has experienced the same pain.

What I realized is that sexuality is not fixed, but rather it’s fluid.

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Rich and Broken-Hearted

December was a good month. Now it is the New Year 2011. The money was made (and a generous portion of it spent!) and I feel empty again.

After periods of breaks, I started working independently as an escort last month. My rates were slightly higher than the going rate for high-class companionship. My phone rang continuously after minimal advertising and continues to ring. I felt very thankful, because I was not sure what to expect. My rates were high, and my service was safe. In the escorting world, most girls who want to charge high rates have to include more ‘extras’ apart from just sex with a condom…..which I simply refuse to do. So I feel thankful. I had a handful of clients that I didn’t even have to sleep with. This is where escorting becomes addictive: when I have clients who pay lots of money for a relatively easy session (ex: minimal work for me).

Yet I sit here. Depressed. Lonely. Full of doubt and uncertainty.

I have been a high class prostitute for nearly five years now. However, I have never done this work full-time, and have had many breaks/vacations in these years. I started in my late teens and now am in my early-mid twenties.

My ex-fiancee brought up a great point in a conversation the other day: “I have made a lot of money and it never made me happy.” This is also true for myself. In the five years I’ve been in the sex industry I have made quite a bit of money, traveled the world, owned most of the material possessions I’ve wanted (except the big one, purchasing a home)…and yet I’ve never been satisfied. And even worse, I have saved nothing. Money that comes easy goes very easily. The old cliché is something I truly believe: more money, more problems.

This blog is about the reality of getting into ‘high-class’ prostitution. I used quotations on ‘high-class’ because the term can often distort the reality. The elegance and glamor of escorting is mostly a facade. It really comes down to SEX — sadly, in most cases, the sex is meaningless between escorts and clients. Yes, sex can be the most spiritual, beautiful experience of two people, but only when true chemistry is established. The reality is that most escorts and clients are not having amazing chemistry. In my own experiences, I do establish chemistry with some of my clients indeed (I enjoy talented men), but my experiences of enjoying clients is certainty not the case for the majority of other escorts. In my blog, I will hopefully get to talk about things from ‘The Girlfriend Experience’ to the types of clients I encounter. I will also mention great books or films I watch that depict the lives/memoirs of other working girls.

Last time I re-read the last few chapters of a book called, “Disgraced” by Saira Ahmed. It’s about a Pakistani-Muslim girl who became a high-class escort. In the last few chapters she discusses her entering and leaving of the escort business. A few times her recollections have brought me to tears when she speaks about how it changed her view of men and her relationships. It reminded me of my ex and I. I still love him. I left him a few months ago….on my own selfish whim.

Being with him for 2.5 years made me realize that I can’t revert to the ‘normal’ life. Back then, however, I assumed that I could easily quit escorting and transition to live a ‘normal’ life when I was ready. In reality, however, it’s not easy to erase an entire lifestyle that has shaped me. It’s impossible to erase my unique ‘taboo’ experiences. It may seem silly to say that but the reality is I cannot quit the industry. Most working girls will understand what I am talking about, because many of them have also tried to leave only to find themselves coming back after ‘breaks.’

I have tried leaving the industry three times now. The last time I tried to leave is because I met the man of my dreams. He was a former client of mine. I thought I could give up my work for love, but I realized it’s not so easy (even when my lover is providing for me financially). Every time I had quit, I yearned to go back to escorting — I started to miss my independence and autonomy.

I met my ex fiance in a new context. I was living overseas in a new country and big city. At first I established myself with a new job that was what us girls call a ‘straight job’ (meaning it wasn’t in the sex industry).  It was in retail. I worked full-time for eight hours each day and made petty money. It didn’t matter because it was just part of the experience of living in a new country for a while. Part of the reason I moved overseas was to stop working in the industry and change my lifestyle and habits. Clearly, back then, I internalized the idea that sex work is harming me. But then, later, I realize I just needed to change my habits — I wanted to be less materialistic and more humble. In my early days, I was using escorting to fuel my ego and consumer habits, which was leaving me feeling empty and shallow. But otherwise, my experiences with clients was actually empowering, which I enjoyed.

Anyway, the retail job overseas only lasted a month until I started missing the easy-pace lifestyle of escorting. The money of escorting is addicting, yet one also becomes accustomed to the self-paced lifestyle and admiration from men. But living a double life made escorting hard. In my ‘normal’ job, I was working so hard, but kept reminding myself that a whole week’s worth of wages is something I could make in 1 hour with a client. Why was I slaving myself for petty pay when I could be paid to essentially get pleasure? That’s what I told myself. Indeed there were many clients I encountered who literally paid me to give me pleasure. With clients, there’s the good, and then there is the average. Most of the men are decent looking and polite. Over the last five years I can only recall maybe 2 or 3 clients that were problematic, but nothing life threatening. Again, I am thankful that I haven’t encountered a dangerous client yet, because I know there a predators out there.

Back to my venture overseas. I ended up going back to the industry. I looked at the local papers and saw hundreds of advertising for escorts, brothels, and massage parlors. I was in a country where prostitution was legal. I wasn’t keen on escorting (going to a client’s hotel), so I decided to try a high-end brothel establishment. I called up one that was located in a posh area, and the following Saturday I ended up working. I made a lot of money that night, and ended up working until the early morning. The following shifts followed the same pattern. I felt great again. Whenever I got back to the industry I felt like I was on top of the world, because the money seemed endless and my ego was inflated. A couple months after going back to the industry in this new country I met my boyfriend (fiance).

I remember the night vividly. I wasn’t even supposed to work that night, but I came into work. Before I even got dressed in my lingerie, the receptionist asked me if I wanted to meet a client in the waiting room. She told me that I was exactly his type: busty, exotic and very attractive. So I went to say hi to him in my normal clothes and he was besotted by my presence. He made an expensive 3 hour booking with me. During those hours, I came to realize that he wasn’t looking solely for sex. From the very beginning, I could see he respected me so much, and he only wanted to do whatever I wanted. He told me about his life: he works all the time, Muslim, alone, doesn’t drink, doesn’t go out too much. Yet he was interested in all the things I liked, such as poetry and cultural traditions (we were from similar origins). From the first meeting, I felt very comfortable with him. The fact he wasn’t touching me, or making a grab for my breasts (like most men do) made me feel I could trust him. I was quite horny that night. Since he was exceptionally polite and refraining from touching me, I felt eager to give him my body. He wanted to see my pleasure first, and kissed my whole body, licking between my legs so lovingly. I crossed my limit and kissed him passionately, as I felt he was special. It was a beautiful first impression. He asked for my number. I told him bluntly that I don’t go out with clients outside of work, but I still gave him my number. Many men ask to take me out, and a few times in the past I had gone with them only to regret it later. But for some reason I trusted him.

I told him I was craving a specific ethnic cuisine, so on our first meeting he took me to a beautiful restaurant overlooking the city. He retained his immense hospitality, respect and generousity. He bombarded me with gifts that night. Not only gifts, but he wrote me beautiful poetry. I did not know how to react. He made me feel like a princess, and his gifts were specially tailored to my personality. My mind always assumed anyone giving me something always had a catch. But I could tell his gifts were from his heart and genuine. He said very honestly that he didn’t expect anything in return. He said, “What makes me happy is seeing you smile.” And his words were legitimate. He wasn’t trying to sleep with me. I had already set my mind that I would not have sex with a client for free. If he were to try to touch me or act sexual I would leave immediately. But he treated me with paramount comfort. The fact that he did not touch me or make a move drove my hormones wild. Instead I gave him a small kiss. But the kiss made both of us melt. That one small kiss ended up into us kissing for hours, literally. Even after kissing he still respectfully kept his hands off my body. Again, most men can’t keep their hands off me, so his patience made me more attracted to him. Finally I motioned him to do something (anything) to my deeply aroused body. So he decided we lay in his bed and cuddle. First he started by softly caressing my body, as if I was a Queen Goddess being served by her humble servant. He kissed my entire body for another 2 hours (literally), teasing me respectfully on literally every inch of my body. His touch was pure admiration, because he went very slowly, enjoying each area with detailed care. This is the ultimate teasing, and his touch was a manifestation of his philosophy. As he used to say, “the best things must occur very slowly and with care. There is no true beauty when things are rushed.” This made me even more aroused, yet I let him continue his magic.  Then he kissed my thighs and slowly started to kiss between my extremely aroused pussy. He did it for over an hour, teasing me and breaking my climaxes — he purposely was edging me. I had the most intense orgasm ever, and the whole time he was brimming hard. He loved to drive me crazy, to the point where I’m shaking.

After that, he still continued to amaze me. After I had orgasm, he just laid back and cuddled me. He was brimming hard, so I thought he would have expected something in return, but he didn’t. He was humble and said he enjoyed giving me pleasure. That made me want to give him pleasure too. So of course, we had to make love. I adore reciprocating pleasure to very talented lovers.

After that first date, I thought of him as a great person and new friend. But, ironically, I did not want to date him and didn’t even think about it. We continued seeing each other and he eventually asked me, “So, are you my girlfriend?” I wasn’t sure what to say because I had not even considered it. I said yes…hesitantly.  We stayed together from then on and he continued to give me the best orgasms every day of our relationship. My ex loved to give me pleasure, whether it was in sex or cooking for me, or writing love poems. 2.5  years later we moved across the world together, got engaged, and then turmoil began. Now, we are living on opposite sides of the world. I left him. I wanted to leave him many times, despite loving him. I realize, now, how accustom I am to my escorting job. I thought I wanted to leave escorting for the ‘perfect’ man, yet I realized (at that moment) that I preferred taking care of myself and having my own autonomy.

And now I love him. And now I need him. But in my own selfishness, I chose my independence over him. In particular, I chose escorting over him. Isn’t it ironic, now, that I have all that I want, and yet I’m unhappy.

I think I see the reality now: a life pursuing only money is worthless.

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